After two years of writing I finally finished the rough-ruff (yes, that’s exactly how I have decided to spell it) of my novel “Frost”. I have been waiting patiently for the day I was able to say that, but now that I am & have, I’m a little on the scared side. When you’re writing it it’s still a secret in your mind. Planning out everything & then putting them to words. The moment you’re able to tell people that you’re done and on to the editing process people get excited.
But now I go into the editing process I wonder to myself, “is this going to be any good?” I’m trying so hard not to toss it into the trash and running away like a coward but it’s extremely hard.
After I finished the rough-ruff draft I decided to sit and scan the whole story – basically rereading what I had forgotten that I had wrote. To me, yes, I still find a few clever things I had written and I got all excited. But then I wonder, do I find it clever and good because I wrote it? Or do I find it good because it’s actually good. My wondering mind seems to go all over the place – crazily. Maybe I should stop wondering.
Either way I have been working way too long just to throw it away, so that’s not an option. I’m going to continue and I’m going to edit, etc, until I am completely satisfied with what I have written, even if it turns out to be complete crap. Then one day – hopefully, get published. Maybe. I might just keep my first novel in a box in the back of my closet and let it collect dust.